A sweet old lady telephoned the hospital.

She timidly asked, “Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?”

The operator said, “I can, what’s the name and room number?”

The old lady in her weak voice said, “Doreen Jacobs, Room 604.”

The operator replied, “Let me place you on hold while I check with her nurse.”

After a few minutes the operator returned to the phone and said,

“Oh, I have good news, her nurse just told me that Doreen is doing very well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back as normal and her physician, Dr. Ross, has scheduled her to be discharged on Tuesday.”

The old lady said, “Thank you.

That’s wonderful! I was so worried! God bless you!”

The operator replied, “You’re more than welcome. Is Doreen your daughter?”

The grandmother said, “No, I’m Doreen Jacobs in room 604. No one tells me sh*t.”